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Every once in a while when I scroll through natural hair groups such as the South African Naturals group, I come across posts like “I had a terrible dream last night…I dreamt my hair got relaxed!”. If you are a frequent visitor of this group I’m sure you’ve probably encountered similar posts at one time or another. While these posts may sometimes come across as funny, there is a real element of fear amongst naturals in terms of losing all that hard-earned work they’ve put into their hair. The fear is real, and I dare say it’s most probably one of the reasons most naturals steer clear of salons…slipping relaxers into shampoos is NOT a joke y’all!

One of very few pictures I took with my relaxed hair, circa 2012 when my hair started breaking
I have a folder on my flash disk which is backed up on my dad’s laptop and portable hard drive (hey Dad, thanks Dad!) where I save every single one of the photos I take during my hair journey. I’m being for real, every single one…tip: if you don’t already do this, you have not reached the level of pure vanity above all things. Okay, I’m kidding…but seriously, save those pics anywhere and everywhere you can. Anyway, recently I came across some pictures from the dark days and I found myself reminiscing about the length of my hair way back when. But a few minutes in and I realised there’s nothing I miss about that bone-straight hair, perhaps it’s growth, perhaps it’s a change of mind-set, but nothing about my relaxed hair appeals to me now as it did back then. With that said, I wanted to share three reasons why I’ll probably never go back to relaxed hair.
Damaged hair
Unlike some naturals, I don’t believe that healthy hair can only be obtained by keeping your hair natural. You can have gorgeous relaxed hair that is healthy just as much as you can have natural hair that is unhealthy and vice versa. On a personal level, relaxers really did one on my hair…it was damaged beyond repair and it just wasn’t growing any longer. I don’t miss mentally preparing myself for relaxer to be slapped onto my head or the burns I would get afterwards, all just to have sleek hair. Besides, at just two years and six months, my natural hair is quickly approaching the length of my relaxed hair when stretched and that, I love. This is not to say that I don’t encounter bumps in my hair journey, I do, but more often than not when I really feel emo about my hair I consider cutting it, rather than relaxing it.
Laziness in creativity
Looking back, when it came to my relaxed hair, there were really only three styles in which I’d wear it: loose, in a ponytail and tucked. Being in high school at the time, there weren’t many styles you could choose from anyway. One thing I’ve realised is that having relaxed hair, at least for me, promoted laziness in creativity. I literally never played around with my hair as much as I do now, not to mention that had I stayed natural I probably wouldn’t know how to twist or braid my hair in its various forms as I do now. There is way too much creativity when it comes to natural hair, man. It’s a-mazeballs!
I Love My Kinky Coily Hair
No way I could end this post without mentioning this. The way I’ve fallen in love with my kinky coils is just on another level. I love my hair now more so than I did back then. Of late I’ve been trying to figure out ways – aside from shrinkage – to wear my coils in all their glory without stretching or manipulating them and thanks to Aunt Jackie’s Knot On My Watch, I finally figured out a way (P.S: this stuff is enchanting when it comes to detangling…kinky, curly or coily, you’ve got to try it ♡). I personally think one way to stay off the creamy crack is to fall in love with your hair…if you haven’t already, what on earth are you waiting for???
This post is not to say that I never loved my relaxed hair, at some point I was head over heels in love with it. But as Jordin Sparks says in one of my favourites, this is my now and I am living in the moment, so no…relaxers might as well go jump 🙂
What reason/s do you have for not wanting to ever relax your hair again?

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